K-chan (masochist_kiss) wrote,
K-chan
masochist_kiss

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Days...

I am talking to ben and I must admit, it's making me seeing some stuff. Like when I went to see white noise with Sarah Saturday she told me that I wasn't allowed to tell Julie we were hanging out or anything like that. That is Julie found out she'd be pissed and sarah didn't want that. This is the reason why I wanna get out of Maryland. I'm sick of the control that people take over my life and how Julie controls who's friend with me, why I am not friends with anyone in NC anymore because they are all afraid of her. And I'm sick of the control that people have on me. Julie, elmer, Dustin all of them have taken me and used me and fucked beat me against the steps! Then after wards keep their hold on me.

And Jose....he use to be always on me and at first I disliked it because it was too much and now we never talk, never see each other and he ignores me for Danny and fucking noodles!?! I can't stand it. I can't being alone in such a state. I just wanna be loved.

And I like susan but I can't think about that because of the people she dated would kill me for it, and I'm not open about me being bisexual so I am not into people at school knowing and she is very open about it and I don't know how that would work out for us. Because I hate when people say shit. People are just plain rude and I know what they can do. God, I can't wait to get out of this state. And my mom's mad at me because we can't get along and that's my fault. Which it isn't! And I need her to hear this paper for chemistry so I can do it right and it's due Thursday and I have conditioning tomorrow and weds. So it'll be hard to do anything and I need to make up a Spanish test, get ready for footloose and make sure I don't fail chemistry so I wont get my ass in trouble.

Also!! I think Ben and Jose have a class together and ben's going to go up to him and tell him how much of a great guy he is for having me......-_- -dies- I don't want him to do that! Why? When Jose doesn't even like me? Well...or so I feel....maybe that's the truth? I don't know anymore and I hate it. Maybe I should just go and jump off a cliff...pathetic ain't it? And I can't even hang out with the person I love the most. I need a new life, and a new family or crap. I just need a place to hide in.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................:D.......

Fang Zandith HN: ::bows:: Yes mistress!
Demonic Kyo07: lol. that's either really scary or extremely cute
Fang Zandith HN: XD
Fang Zandith HN: Both?
Demonic Kyo07: sure, why the hell not!
Fang Zandith HN: lol

damn you danny when I am suppose to be pissed off at you! You always make me laugh.

And My chemical romance is making me feel ok, lol I love that music video

"you've got something in your eye."
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 0 comments